I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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