did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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