Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
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