I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
