Barsexuality is the new black.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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