Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
