my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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