it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Ladies don't puke and tell
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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