I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
