She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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