Don't you send me to vm
he puts the penis in happiness.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
