Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I have feelings that need drinking.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
