so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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