think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
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We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
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you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.