I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...