i think my mom watched the whole time
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
