I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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