May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize
