so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
