I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
