I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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