i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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