smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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