i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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