Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
