I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
