We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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