I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize