I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
