She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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