I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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