Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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