i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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