Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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