VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
