from now on my penis is your penis
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
