Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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