so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
