I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
