All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
