This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
it's great music for shaving your balls
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
