That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize