I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god was she eating orange peels again
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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