No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
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