she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
