Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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