Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
