We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
The struggles of a small town man whore
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
