He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
