Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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