Define "chronic" masturbator.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
In America we eat man semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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