i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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